• ExpatTherapyBarcelona

Trusting yourself


Wouldn't it be wonderful if we were born with an inherent indicator, an alarm of sorts that could gently but assertively nudge us whenever we stumble over our own confidence and trust in ourselves. Once activated, it would benevolently guide us back to that steady grounded place of neutral confidence, that feeling of peaceful embodied presence.


Having a trust indicator, would make things so much easier. Think about it, so many hours of doubt, worry and confusion could be averted. So many worry filled moments could be spent in curiosity and creativity instead.


I think I know how we got here, to this place of self doubt and insecurity. Besides the probability of having some benefits to our survival, it seems to have been also utilized to manipulate and control our choices and behaviors along the way. Most of us were raised in a way in which our very existence felt undermined. Our thoughts, opinions and emotions negatively judged and valued at each turn. If you look around, the foundations of all our systems have been written and created out of this very code, compromising and weakening our ability to value, accept and realize the uniqueness that we each are and the commonalities that we all share.


I've found, however, that although we may have not been born with that 'trust yourself indicator', we have been equipped with the mental plasticity and emotional resilience necessary to recode and rewrite the most stubborn of patterns. Of course this task is not an easy one, it takes practice, daily practice, moment by moment practice.


For instance, any time you become aware of your own insecurities, doubting your initiatives and direction, and find yourself scrambling to hold on to something solid, stop a moment, take a couple of deep breaths and focus on the parts of you that are stable and grounded. Take notice of the processes in you that have brought you here despite the challenges, the momentum that moves you towards your goals, despite the difficulties faced. It may be interesting to remember how much you share with everyone else on this planet, the desire to live, to love and be loved, and specially the insecurities of living in a constantly changing world. Despite the many who claim to know the hierarchy of what is worthwhile and valuable, and the fabricated differences that we righteously hold on to, we are all the same. It may be helpful to remember that in the end, you belong here, and all that you are, have been and will be, weighs in value the same as everyone else.



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