It's not easy to notice how my own feelings, expectations and fears can be so easily assigned to external events, situations and people. Interpretations and projections of what I think is happening seem to creep ever so silently and discretely. In a moment and without my noticing, these projections quickly blanket the current moment in a fabric of my own story, my own meaning and conclusions.
You'd think that we could recognize the stagnant nature of these old patterns, you know that 'redo step' of the cat in The Matrix code. But no, we often don't. Projections, based on old beliefs, are so deeply integrated with the perceptions of who I AM, what I NEED and feelings of SAFETY that syncing is often seamless. This familiarity allows our limited interpretations to be expressed as genuinely authentic response to an event, a person.
It's often too late when we realize what happened. The skewed interpretation which led to confusion and further reinforce feelings of alienation, become clearer from a distance. It's hard to admit to oneself the incomplete nature of our perspectives, our beliefs. But, unfortunately, it is only through recognizing our limitations that we enter the possibilities of more authentic expression and meaning of 'what's really happening in my life.'
Becoming aware of the tell tale signs of projections onto communications is the first step. Noticing how we may have stopped listening to what's happening around us and instead listening to what we are saying to ourselves is one way. Becoming aware of the sensations in our body which feel tight, restricted and poised in a certain way and helping ourselves to find more comfort and openness in our stance. Stopping for a moment before you respond, react, breathing several deep breaths. Asking yourself, what is really happening here? What am I sensing in my body, what are the thoughts which dictate the emotions I feel? Remind yourself how this situation, despite similarities to past events, is fresh, new and loaded with infinite alternate possibilities. Stop, breathe, sense, feel, think, ask and be willing to respond differently to this new event which carries with it its own interpretation and information. You might be surprised at all the possibilities which may surface by which to understand what's really going on.